Thief
by Saiyans are scared of Bulma
Summary: Skipper and the gang get an assignment - travel out of New York to find an uncatchable thief. But they get more than they bargain for! Humanized, AU. WARNING - gets really, really weird later on.


His men were running down a hallway. He was the last one in line; Rico was at the end waiting for the others. "Coming Dollface?" He wasn't last after all.

"I'm going as fast as I can! And don't call me Dollface!" He glanced over his shoulder. There was a girl running behind him, a six-foot staff in one hand. Her brown hair framed her face, the bangs in the middle tied up. She was fast, almost - _almost,_ but not quite - matching his pace – which, he realized, he had slowed for her. Still, it was too slow.

"Hurry, before they call the guards!" He called over his shoulder.

"Well excuuuse me for not being specially trained!"

"Skipper, we don't have time!" Kowalski, who had reached the end of the tunnel, yelled at the feuding two.

Skipper and the girl made it to the end just in time to hear Private's "Too late, Kowalski." The girl and Skipper looked around the team to find faceless guards awaiting them with spears and shields, as if straight out of Roman myth. "See what you did?" The leader turned to the girl while gesturing to the soldiers.

"What _I_ did? What about – Oh, never mind!" She twirled her staff and turned away to hold it defensively in front of her. "At least I can take care of myself."

"_HOT!_" Rico stated, spying her tramp stamp tattoo of a winged heart as her shirt slid up.

"I must agree with Rico…" Kowalski blushed as he scratched his chin with one finger.

"Well, she _is_ kind of cute." Private's eyes slid over to Skipper, who just stared on in disbelief. What were his men doing? "Now is hardly the time, guys!" he yelled.

"Especially since I'm right here!" the girl said blushing as she slammed one of the enemies into the ground. _Boys!_ she thought, rolling her eyes. She failed to notice what was happening until the last minute, when the floor dropped from beneath her. She was able to get "What the-?" out before the black vortex swallowed her head. Luckily, she kept hold of her staff, which was too big to fit through the portal. To her – and the team's – horror, the portal expanded, quickly releasing the staff's hold.

She felt herself fall.

Skipper threw himself to the floor near the portal and they grabbed each other's arms. Their eyes locked.

"You have to let go." She said. He noticed the sides of the portal closing.

"I can't. I won't let you fall. I promised." When had that happened?

"You'll lose your arm."

"I don't want to lose you." _What!_

"Sorry." She let go of his arm. He could feel her slipping. Tears gathered in both of their eyes.

She fell.

He screamed, then was jerked out of the portal by Rico, who carried him to safety.

Two people in two places woke up, at the same time, one thinking of her wannabe savoir and the other of the last look of despair the former gave him before she fell to her doom.

We'll start with the young man. He was Skipper, leader of the Penguins despite being the second-to-youngest of his squad. He was seventeen and _very_ good looking, with thick black hair that fell in spikes down pale skin. His ice blue eyes could stare straight through you if you got on his bad side. He sat up in his bed and put his bare feet on the cold floor. He needed to talk to Kowalski.

Now, Kowalski was the eldest at the age of twenty-six. And although he was the smartest, he had a lot of… mishaps in the lab which resulted in explosions. He was also the tallest of the group. His black haired covered his left eye, then fell to his neck in the back. He, too, had blue eyes, but not as cold as Skipper's.

_BOOM!_ An explosion shook the building. Skipper smiled and headed for the lab it came from. Kowalski was out in the hall with a fire extinguisher when he got there. The bottom of the man's lab coat had been burnt and was still smoking a little, the rest of it covered in soot.

"Skipper?" he coughed. "What brings you here?"

"I had another dream."

"Oh boy," Kowalski sighed. Just then Rico and Private ran around the corner.

"What's going on here?" asked the youngest in his British accent.

Private was the youngest and shortest. But he was valuable. The fourteen-year-old could cute his way out of just about anything. He had shaggy brown hair he swept to the side and big light blue eyes that gave the cutest puppy dog look on command. He could pull off the 'cute and cuddly' look while simultaneously kicking your butt.

Rico, on the other hand, looked and acted deadly, even when trying to be casual. He was nineteen, but gave off a threatening air, often leaving him alone and friendless before Skipper took him in. His eyes, like the rest of the team's, were blue and he had a scar that split his lips on one side. His hair was jet black and hung down to frame his face in the front, but pulled into a ponytail in the back.

"We need to see Alex." And with those five words, Skipper led the Penguins to Alex, head of both the Lion division and of The Zoo.

The Zoo was a secret vigilante organization that used the cover of a paranormal investigation and had types of animals as codenames. The Penguins, the Lions, the Chameleons, etc. Most groups recruited people who were like them: the Lions would recruit those with abnormal strength, the Dolphins those with abnormal intelligence, the Chameleons those that could hide anything anywhere. Why yes, 'abnormal' as in supernatural. The only team that didn't follow that example were the Penguins.

Skipper started it at ten, deciding not sticking to just one talent. The first one he went to was Kowalski, a Dolphin at the time. After a series of events, he was able to convince the genius to switch to his team. The ex-Dolphin and penguin leader became fast friends after that. Six months passed when they found Private. He was an orphan, run away from the orphanage and using his adorableness to steal from others. A good addition to the Dog squad, a better addition to the Penguins. Private jumped eagerly at the chance to have a good home and food to fill his belly for the rest of his life. A year had passed when they found Rico, alone at fifteen. He was a runaway, unable to take the teasing of his classmates. He was hesitant at first, but Skipper was persuasive. Besides, those people didn't run from him. He was well suited for the Chameleons, but declined their offer to stick with the Penguins.

Alex didn't support it a hundred percent at first, but the Penguins had proved to be the best team since Rico joined them four years ago. They were at the top, and had been for a while. That, combined with their age, made them the perfect team for the mission he had in mind. He wasn't that surprised when they walked into his office without even knocking. He didn't know what Skipper could do, what made him able to join The Zoo, but he knew that Skipper got weird dreams now and then that told him what he needed to do, where he needed to go.

"Ah, hello boys. I trust Skipper had a dream again?" He asked in his sometimes annoying showboating voice. Skipper told him about it. "Hm. Do you remember her name?" No. "What she looked like?" No, just her brown hair. "Any distinguishing marks? Special skills?"

"N – wait," Skipper thought a moment. He remembered her turning her back, and Rico called her 'hot'. Skipper closed his eyes. "She could fight – kicked ass with a staff. And… A tattoo," he remembered, "a winged heart, on her lower back."

"Tramp stamp?" Rico asked with a chuckle.

"Yep. Tramp stamp." He turned to Alex. "So we need to find this girl and save her – from what, I don't know. But apparently we were friends, and I promised to protect her or something."

"That's all well and good, guys, but I have a mission for you. Maybe you'll meet her there."

"And this mission is?"

Alex grinned and showed them a card in a plastic bag. Skipper inhaled sharply. "That can't be…"

"It is." It was the size of a normal playing card; on the back was a winged heart sitting on a background of flames. The other side had a black heart with a red slash running through it.

"She's back." Skipper smiled evilly.

'She' referred to a thief everyone knew about. She was amazing, uncatchable, definitely something strange going on there. Skipper had tried many times, but she was able to slip right through his fingers _EVERY. SINGLE. TIME._ And it annoyed Skipper. She always sent two notes out telling what she would steal and when: one to the media, the other to The Zoo. Alex sent the Penguins the first time. Skipper was the only one to come face-to-face with her then, and from that point on he took the assignments personally. But there was something about her… He acted different when they met. His team wouldn't admit it, but they knew that the two flirted; as much of a Batman and Catwoman relationship if they ever saw one.

"Where do we go this time?" Kowalski asked.

Alex's grin widened. "She's not stealing, but we know where she is."

"Oh, my," the secretary said, "one new teacher and four new students in the same day!"

Skipper smiled. "Kind of weird, huh?" He frowned. "Wait, there's a fourth student?"

"Yes," the woman sighed. "She came earlier. Now, here are your schedules…" She went on to describe the layout of the school, where their classes were, giving them their textbooks and such.

"_We were able to trace the card to a high school in a small town outside of New York City," Alex told them, "You start on Monday."_

Private, Rico, and Skipper walked out of the office and headed to the science hall. "I can't believe I have to teach high school." Kowalski said as they approached. He walked them into his room and locked the door.

"Don't worry Kowalski," Private told him, "It's only for this mission. It should be over soon."

"I don't know about that, Private." Skipper interrupted. "She's sneaky, clever, and can trick all of us. Besides, we have no clue who she is. She could be the next girl you see. She could be expecting us, ready to kill us on sight." That silenced them all. "In other news, there just happens to be another new student starting. Kind of… coincidental, don't you think?"

Before anyone could think about it, the bell rang.

"Everyone be on the lookout for anyone suspicious. Kowalski and I stay here for first block. Private and Rico are in the same classes the whole day. Go!"

Kowalski unlocked the door and students started piling in slowly. Skipper sat in the back to watch all the students as they came in. The next bell rang, warning everyone that there was only one minute to get to class. Right as the late bell rang, a girl ran into the room, just beating it. She scanned the room for an empty seat; the only one was a shared table with Skipper. She sank into the chair with an exhausted sigh.

"Rough morning?" asked Skipper.

"You have no idea," she replied with a yawn. She was pale, with amber eyes and brown shoulder length hair. "I just moved here from California. My name's Marlene." She held her hand out.

He took it. "Skipper. Nice to meet you."

"Funny name." With that, she turned to Kowalski, who was introducing himself.

"_I have a friend who teaches science there. He's going on a vacation, so that'll be your job, Kowalski."_

"My name is Justin Kowalski. Just Kowalski is fine. What happened to your other teacher?"

"He had a mental breakdown." A random student replied.

"Wasn't right in the head."

"But he was fun, like Ms. Doris."

"Who was he?" Kowalski asked. No one knew. "Did no one pay attention in his class?" Nope. Kowalski gave them a reading assignment on forces while he rifled through the desk. Most of the old teacher's stuff had been removed, but Kowalski managed to find a bit a stationary with his name and address.

_Melman G. Raff._

Kowalski smiled. He knew Melman. A retired Giraffe, the best in medical skills. He was lost in a reverie of his early days as a Dolphin (Dolphins and Giraffes were close friends) when the door to his room was opened.

"Knock knock!" A blue-haired woman walked in, both hands behind her back and a smile on her face. "I hope you don't mind my intrusion, but I heard the new science teacher had a thing for sweets!" She pulled a jar of chocolate-chip cookies from behind her back.

"Who's that?" Skipper whispered to Marlene.

"I don't know. This is my first day here."

He eyed her suspiciously. "What a coincidence. Mine too."

Up front, Kowalski was speechless. "My name's Doris," the woman was saying. He couldn't quite keep up with the one-sided conversation as he was much too distracted by her beauty. Her deep blue eyes sparkled in wide eyes ringed by thick lashes. Her heart-shaped face and full pink lips were perfect. Her cheeks were rosy, whether from makeup or talking, he couldn't tell. He could feel his cheeks warm in a blush. She was looking at him expectantly.

"O-oh! Um, m-my name's Kowalski. Ju-Justin Kowalski, but my friends just call me Kowalski." He smiled at her. "I like your…" _Everything!_ "…Hair." It ended halfway down her back and was dyed blue.

"Thanks! You know, the school dress code doesn't allow it, but I think that's stupid. I should've been fired long ago, but my dad is the principle." She handed him a cookie, then walked around the room and gave one to each student. All replied with a 'Thank you, Ms. Doris.' Skipper and Marlene were last to get one. "Oh! You must be two of the new students! Well, welcome to New York!" She winked at them then walked up front with a cookie in her mouth. "Well, I just wanted to welcome you, so I guess I better leave you to your class." She shut the door behind her.

Skipper saw the look on Kowalski's face. He was falling for her, hard.

"Just keep reading!" he yelled when he noticed the kids laughing at him.

The rest of the class passed in silence. When the bell rang, Skipper continued to his next class: Electronics. He found Marlene there, sitting in the back. He sat beside her. "Stalking me or something?" he teased playfully.

"I was here first, so _you_ would be the stalker." They flirted through the class, each one thinking that there was something familiar about the person they were talking to.

The class went by quickly, and at lunch they went their separate ways, although they shared it. Marlene went to the cafeteria and Skipper went to Kowalski's room.

"There's something strange about the new girl. I feel like I've seen her before." Was the first thing out of the teen's mouth when he met with his team.


End file.
